I no longer care

by phillipdouglasbooks

I no longer care – by Lacy

I no longer care what color my curtains are

Or even what they’re made out of

My friend Sara has old tshirts in her windows

our curtains

I no longer care if my couch matches the décor of my living room

There are only a handful of couches in this town

Lots of tree stumps though

                                                                                  our couch

I no longer care if my kitchen sink is brushed nickel finish to hide the water spots

I don’t need to ask my neighbor for a bucket of water each morning like my friend Mia
our sink

I no longer care if my light fixtures are classic or modern or shabby chic or bright white or soft white light

I have electricity – no need to burn candles at night like Paula – and keep the toddler from burning himself
I no longer care if my shower head has options for high pressure or pulsating massage or gentle mist

Or even if I have one at all

I get to shower from a pipe above my head – at the quick turn of a knob – no hauling buckets of water like my friend Sophia

our shower

I no longer care what color my walls are

To even afford a wall in its normal wooden color is blessing enough for Daniella. (Her plastic tarp wall separates her eleven-month-old from the chicken coop.)

our green walls
I no longer care… But I used to care a lot. And I am sorry. I am so very sorry. 
But I’m also grateful – grateful for a new freedom. It’s a freedom – to have eyes to see what matters. Who matters.

Jesus, forever help me to choose the simple option – and to give the difference to others who have nowhere near the luxury in which I live…in which I still live….even now. These walls are luxury, this couch, this running water….luxury…

One thought on “I no longer care”

Leave a comment